THE POLY-ORDINARY PAGE

home of the PolyPioneers in Aotearoa/New Zealand

P o l y a m o r y   f o r   o r d i n a r y  
p e o p l e   !


Polyamory has also been called "radical loving" - "unbounded loving" - or, in our case, "loving unlimited". Essentially it means loving ourselves, one another and all of Nature, without dogmatic restrictions and limits. This is especially important in what are thought of as "sexual" interactions and relationships among people.

Polyamory has some basic important guidelines. Without those present, we may find older-style "swinging", "open relationships", and other forms of shared sexual interactions beyond the monogamous couple.

Polyamory, for us, necessarily means respectful behaviour, honesty and transparency in our intimate relationships, and inclusion of everyone involved in the way(s) and to the extent that each wishes and chooses for her/himself :
Respectful behaviour means precisely what it says: Each and every person has the right and responsibility for making it clear just how, where and when s/he wishes and chooses to be approached, and 'involved' - or not - and others need to respect those choices. The basic 'rule' here is, "Yes" means yes; and "No" means no.
Honesty and transparency means being truthful in our communications that includes not 'hiding' anything about the relationships we have and the sort of sexual interactions involved - inside our own intimate friendship circle(s), and with other people whom we trust with information about our personal lives. It does not mean having to broadcast everything to everybody !
Inclusiveness means "holding no one out" so that they are unaware or uninvited in the relationships we have with others thus making it possible for everyone involved to request to be included in our intimate friendships, to the extent they may wish. The extent and degree of 'involvement' needs to be 'negotiated' and agreed on by all concerned, and that may require some respectful 'conflict resolution' processes - with facilitation and mediation if and as necessary. The essential point of 'inclusivity' is a basic openness in principle for others to be informed and included in polyamorous relating among all those involved.

Polyamory of this sort is now "coming out" and being recognized as a valid, worthwhile, healthy, and above all NATURAL and SPIRITUAL path for human beings. Our work in the "Eros Project" is to facilitate polyamorous relationships as an important aspect of the NEW-PARTNERSHIP CULTURE/CIVILISATION that is being birthed now on Mother Earth. And we're keen to assist very ordinary people who want to learn this path.


PolyPioneers are visionaries/facilitators in the polyamory, panfidelity, Eco-Village and permaculture networks. We have personal experience and links with the Network For a New Culture and the Aluna Clan in America; the Centre For Experimental Cultural Design (ZEGG), in Germany and its affiliated Tamera experimental "new culture" community in Portugal -- among many others.
The newest of these is the extremely useful Institute for 21st Century Relationships This research and documentation organisation on "alternative relationship models" - of all kinds - demonstrates both the desirability and urgent need of 'opening up' the old orthodoxies of how human beings 'ought' to engage with one another in loving relationships that really work !

Why do we say "Poly-Ordinary ?"

We are extra-"ordinary" people : we see our job as facilitating polyamorous relationships among all those who are interested in exploring that path -- not just some "special" people who have some presumed "special abilities" in that area that most others don't. Given the benefits of sound coaching and facilitation based on our daily practice and experiences in this area, anxiety melts away, jealousy is replaced by compersion, and fear of "losing out" disappears in the face of love and joy multiplied and extended.

These are things that have to be experienced directly : writing about them may sound good, but until "compersion" is felt personally it doesn't mean much. We know that from our own experience.


If you're interested, you can ask to join PolyKiwis eGroup at Yahoo.


People who have made direct contact with us may request to participate in the Aluna Aotearoa eGroup at Yahoo. That consists of genuine "PolyPioneers" who share our own vision for the creation of a centre in Aotearoa/NZ for people supportive of polyamorous relationships.
NOTE : To join any Yahoo Group, you need to "register" on their site, and we urge you to be careful in choosing the "Login Name" ( or "handle" ) and email address you want to use for that purpose -- to assure yourself of the degree of anonymity that you'll be comfortable with. Once "registered", your Login Name ( or "handle" ) cannot be changed.

You can, however, create additional "Profile(s)" for yourself, and add up to five additional email addresses from which to choose one for any given "Group" you join - but that requires a bit more computer skill. We'll be happy to assist you with that if and when you decide you need some help !


The Network For a New Culture is an American polyamory network which holds summercamps from time to time.
Check out their Document Library and Other Resources for very useful information, articles, letters from members, organisations and links to the whole range and scope of the Polyamory Movement in the emerging New-Partnership Era.


POEMS
In Quiet Waters
On Distance

Articles
All right, so What Is 'Polyamory'?
Twelve Guidelines for a Peaceful Humane Earth
On the New-Partnership Era
Polyamory : "Loving Unlimited"
New-Partnership Economics : "Trusts Unlimited"
An Invitation to Men [which we extend to all people!] - by Oriah Mountain Dreamer
"Panfidelity and the Birth of the Aluna Clan", by Michael Aluna

For Michelle's [Canadian] POLY CLASSIFIEDS SITE and essays on Polyamory click her banner :

Personals LogoFind new lovers! CLICK HERE to go to Polyamory Connections

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